Wednesday, July 6, 2016

A Rare Moment of Lucidity

"Rarely have 30 minutes of television so perfectly encapsulated the decline and fall of the rule of law and the extraordinary privileges enjoyed by America's liberal elite. After listing abuse after abuse -- and detailing lie after lie -- Comey declared that 'no reasonable prosecutor' would prosecute Hillary for her obvious and manifest crimes. It's good to be a Clinton. ...Rules and standards are for the little people. 
The FBI demolished every Clinton excuse and blew apart every Clinton lie, but soon she might well walk into rooms serenaded to the sweet sounds of 'Hail to the Chief.' To paraphrase the words of Benjamin Franklin, we've got a banana republic, if Hillary can keep it." - NRO

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Snoop Dogg to Pimp for Hillary and the DNC

Famed Social Scientist and Entertainer Rapper, Calvin Broadus, Jr. 
In an attempt to get the ghetto rats interested in the election and back on the reservation for Hillary, Calvin Broadus , aka Snoop Dogg's latest act will be to bring together the Democratic Party.  The rapper is set to headline a "unity party" following the last night of the Democratic National Convention on July 28 in Philadelphia co-hosted by the super PACs Priorities USA, the Senate Majority PAC and the House Majority PAC, the groups announced Tuesday.
Mr. Dogg announced that he would be supporting Hillary Clinton less than a month after she declared her candidacy in May 2015. 
"You know I like to be politically correct, but sometimes I’m politically incorrect. Watch What Happens Live. But I’ll say that I would love to see bitches a woman in office because I feel like we’re at that stage in life to where we need a perspective other than the male’s train of thought. And just to have bitches a woman speaking from a global perspective as far as representing America, I’d love to see that. So I’ll be voting for da bitch Ms. Clinton." 
The groups also announced that the Grammy-winning group Los Lobos will perform.  And I would imagine a heavy presence of Police and Emergency Medical personal will also be in attendance.

[Politico]

So Much For The Rule of Law


Saturday, July 2, 2016

The National Archives Display the Original Unused Draft of The Declaration of Independence

 Ben, John, Sam and Tom walk into a Tavern….....

NOTE: In 1770, the average per capita intake of distilled spirits (whiskey, rum, gin and brandy) was 40 gallons; by 1820, the per capita intake exceeded 50 .


After some thought, the framers of the original 
document put down the Ale mugs and all
agreed to a rewrite, and to be a little more diplomatically
thorough in telling King George to kiss their asses. 

Along with the U.S. Constitution, the rewritten Declaration 
has pretty much been ignored in modern times.
_________________________________

Thursday, June 30, 2016

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Ladies, Don't Be Swapping Spit and DNA with #NeverTrumpers!

Roosh V.
I ran across a column hilariously titled “Why You Should Not Have Sex With Girls Who Hate Donald Trump ” on a blog titled 'Return of Kings' by  Rooch V., self-proclaimed 'King of Masculinity'. He's an expert pick-up artist, cock hound, and author of books on misogyny, who by the way literally lives in his mom’s basement, and encourages his followers to not have sex with women who do not like Donald Trump.  Quite frankly,  I find myself in a bit of quandary agreeing with a well known misogynist who looks like an Arab terrorist and lives in a hole underneath a house. But I too don't think these people, male or female, should have sex, ever, period.

From Roosh's column:
"While Donald Trump is far from a perfect Presidential candidate, he represents ideas of beauty, tradition, truth, and nationalism. It’s not surprising that those who hate him and protest at his rallies represent the polar opposite: ugliness, degeneracy, lies, and globalism, though mostly ugliness. The women you see at anti-Trump rallies are awash in obesity, masculine behavior, and utter repulsiveness. For this reason, I recommend that you completely stop having sex with Trump haters....."
Roosh explains, “Good women don’t hate Trump.” He also explains this by way of describing his current “girlfriend” who doesn’t hate Trump, and is “good.”
"I’m currently dating a girl who is apathetic about Trump. She doesn’t love him but doesn’t hate him either, and finds him more entertaining than anything. From that, you can correctly guess that she is feminine, thin, and sweet-natured......"
Sadly, Roosh V.'s Present Girlfriend

He also gives the guys some valuable pick up lines to help weed out the Trump Hating wenches from us beautiful Trump Babes:
  • “Today I’m actually having a good day because my Donald Trump hat came in.”
  • “Excuse me, I was on my way to a Trump supporter meeting but you have a happy walk and I wanted to know if you were also going to the same Trump meeting.”
  • “What do I do? I support Trump. I’m doing some work now to make sure he gets elected this November, because it’s time to make America great again.” 
So ladies, please take some unsolicited advice.......don't have relations with male #NeverTrumpers. It could lead to horrible arguments at Thanksgiving Dinners at your taxpayer subsidized housing over a government guaranteed equitable size for all turkey. We have enough little commie globalist running around on college campi now. We don't need you breeding anymore of them. 

And next time one of those virile, horn-rimed glass wearing pajama boy types approach you at your knitting circle or yoga class and invites you to he's apartment, basement to jizz all over you, just politely tell him he'd have more luck with a hair legged Social Justice Warrior, or just suggest he go indulge in sexual intercourse with himself.   

Monday, June 27, 2016

Famous Local Negro Golfer and Actor Contemplates Retirement

The Maui Wowie Free Press
by Roachclip Johnson: 


Barry Soetoro
Hawaii 411 Baby - As we have kept you abreast in the past with Local Negro Boy Makes Good on the Mainland,  news has reached us that semi-pro golfer, author, comedian, political commentator and actor Barry Soetoro (stage name Barack Obama) plans to retire in late fall of this year after failure of contract renewal.

Mr. Soetoro's once wildly popular show 'Barack Obama' and his portrayal for mainland television audiences of a bumbling, much traveled and leisure oriented closeted gay President of the United States married to an overbearing transvestite First Lady, will end it's eight year run.

In recent years, the 'Barack Obama Show' popularity has waned as cast members left for greener pastures and Mr. Soetoro's frequent absence because world travel and golfing interest have taken priority. 

Sertoro has plans to live in the Washington DC area where golf courses are plenty and he is close to the main stage of politics. He also plans to make himself available to daytime talk shows and cable news networks for his brand of rambling goofy commentary and folksy views on the politics of the day that his verbose and sometime thought challenged famous character is know for.  There is even rumor of another fictional autobiography in the works. 



Editors Note:  Roachclip Johnson is an Award Winning Herbal Cultivation Reporter for The Maui Wowie Free Press, and when free on bond a contributor to Middle Finger News Service International 

Evil Disguises Himself as an Angel of Light. So it is no Surprise That His Servants Also Disguise Themselves as Servants of Righteousness


And Now the Pope Wants Us to Apologize to These People......

A Good Monday Morning