CNN BREAKING NEWS: Joe Biden Still Not Running For President

Despite CNN’s recent love note to Vice President Joe Biden that it has voluntarily changed its own rules and will do all the backflips and blow kisses and do his laundry and wash his car if Old Joe will please, pretty please, run for president,  Biden has declined to accept the offer. At least for now. At this time. Winky winky, no definitive announcement, stay tuned, keep those fingers crossed!

Despite everyone in the Media reciting Biden’s name three times and clicking their heels to see if that might summon him into the Democratic primary, anonymous people who claim to know things say the same thing he’s been saying, which is that he has not decided to run for president. I guess the media are worried he’ll forget to let anyone know when he makes a decision one way or another.

The Media the party is feverishly behind the scenes begging for an alternative to Hillary Clinton.  We are doubled over with laughter that CNN voluntarily changed its rules to allow Joe to participate in the Democratic debate, if he so wishes, if he decides, if he changes his mind.....and with no missing airplane to go wall-to-wall with, Joe is their next best bet for ratings.

Ol' Joe has extended his window for deciding whether to jump into the 2016 presidential campaign, several Democrats say, allowing the contest to play out even longer before he answers one of the biggest questions hanging over the race for the White House.