* All farm subsidies redirected towards the cultivation of patchouli.
* ObamaCare insurance coverage mandates revised to include heavier emphasis on healing crystals.
* As a cost-saving measure, "Hail to the Chief" now played at presidential events exclusively by Joan Baez on autoharp.
* Gay marriage legalized nationwide by executive order. Heterosexual marriage repealed in favor of "going wherever the wind takes you."
* Taking logical next step on sensible recommendation of Al Armendariz, EPA to begin utilizing actual crucifixions.
* Common Core revised to include section on "areas where Howard Zinn didn't go far enough."
* Abandoning traditional National Security Strategy document, grand strategy now formulated with "really chilled out vision board"
* Carbon emissions reduced by overhaul of national automobile fleet to foot-pedaled Flintstones vehicles.
* Every U.S. Army battalion staffed by at least one person responsible for placing carnations in gun barrels.
* NASA budget reallocated to fund nationwide astral projection project.Run Bernie, Run!