Plans To Shoot Apple Off Debbie Wasserman-Schultz’s Head
“I know. Using a watermelon is sorta racist, but I really want my President to look good when the cameras roll,” said Wasserman-Schultz when confronted about the apple substitution.
Sources say the President will attempt to knock the apple off at about 35 yards using his own 12 gauge shotgun equipped with a modified choke and number six turkey shot. Part of the viewing public that will witness the first ever shooting exhibition by a sitting US President are the ambassadors from Egypt, Iraq, Saudi Arabia, and Lebanon who openly are rooting for a missed shot.
A non-deterred Wasserman-Schultz proudly beamed about being the center of attention once more since the elections in November and shared with those around her how it reminded her of college days at NYU…”Gosh! I can fondly recall being the center for Delta Ki frat boys for their skeet shoot. Now, those boys could really shoot!”
Obama mused that using turkey shot would be appropriate.