Thursday, June 30, 2011

Finally, Someone Speaks the Truth on MSNBC

"OMG, Did You Hear Mark Halperin Like Literally Called Barack Obama a Dick?"

Obama Supporter
Peppermint Jones
OMG! Did you guys see Morning Joe this morning? O.K., it was amazing. Like, literally amazing. Mark—you remember Mark? Mark Halperin? He’s kind of like, has brown hair and smiles sometimes? He’s friends with your annoying friend from college?—whatever, anyway, so Mark was talking to Joe, Joe Scarborough, and Joe was like, “Mark, what’s up with Barack Obama acting so cool and important at yesterday’s press conference. Obama was, like, telling the Republicans what to do?"

"Like, did you think that was uncool, and sort of lame?”

And like, all Mark had to do was agree, and be, like, “Yeah, totally, but whatever,” and that would have been that. There was no reason to make a thing of it. But you know Mark—or maybe you don’t? It doesn’t matter—so, of course, he went completely overboard by being, like, “I thought he was kind of a dick yesterday.” Literally, he just like said that. Swear to God, literally. And everyone was like, !!  

Get the Scoop here: The Hill
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Sunday, June 26, 2011

Obama Family Firmly in the D.C. Groove.

Well, 3 out of 4 Ain't Bad

The Obamas
With their schedule filled with wonderful vacation destinations, the matriarch happily nagging the entire nation with great regularity and the daughters thriving at a prestigious D.C. school, the Obama's excel in Washington.  If not for the patriarch's struggles with his temporary job, it's safe to say the Obama's would be batting a thousand. But what a time they are having.

Sure, Mr. Obama has thus far failed to live up to astronomical expectations of the brain dead voter and robots in the media, but have you seen the First Lady's garden!  Soon, Mr.Obama will return to his comfort zone. Once he's back on the campaign trail, people will again be so in awe of his ability to read a teleprompter, to lie tout his record and verbally duel with his Republican rival. They'll completely forget about how he has come off in foreign diplomatic settings just slightly more intelligent then Joe Biden or he struggles to utter even a single word while in the Oval Office being told by key members of the military, 'we need a decision'.  We all have strengths and weaknesses - even the President. Of course the evil Republican spin machine is attempting to convince the nation that the ability to make Americans feel safer is somehow less praiseworthy than actually making us safer.

Until Mr. Obama begins campaigning for a second term, his family will support him every way possible. While the Mr. Obama is thrilled to see his offspring excel in school, they courteously don't completely cover the White House refrigerator door with perfect papers in fear it would remind their father that polling data indicates not everyone is equally satisfied with his work and job performance.
    
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Harry & Bess

Oh, how self important we've become.....
 
Harry Truman was a different kind of President. He probably made as many, or more important decisions regarding our nation's history as any of the other 32 Presidents preceding him. However, a measure of his greatness may rest on what he did after he left the White House.

The only asset he had when he died was the house he lived in, which was in Independence Missouri. His wife had inherited the house from her mother and father and other than their years in the White House, they lived their entire lives there.

When he retired from office in 1952, his income was a U.S. Army pension reported to have been $13,507.72 a year. Congress, noting that he was paying for his stamps and personally licking them, granted him an 'allowance' and, later, a retroactive pension of $25,000 per year.

After President Eisenhower was inaugurated, Harry and Bess drove home to Missouri by themselves. There was no Secret Service following them.

When offered corporate positions at large salaries, he declined, stating, "You don't want me. You want the office of the President, and that doesn't belong to me. It belongs to the American people and it's not for sale.."

Even later, on May 6, 1971, when Congress was preparing to award him the Medal of Honor on his 87th birthday, he refused to accept it, writing, "I don't consider that I have done anything which should be the reason for any award, Congressional or otherwise."

As president he paid for all of his own travel expenses and food.

Modern politicians have found a new level of success in cashing in on the Presidency, resulting in untold wealth. Today, many in Congress also have found a way to become quite wealthy while enjoying the fruits of their offices. Political offices are now for sale.

Good old Harry Truman was correct when he observed, "My choices in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician, and to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference!"
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Thursday, June 23, 2011

We Know He's a Classless Jerk, But......

Nominee for Diogenes' 2011 Asshat of the Year


Roger Ebert
Techdirt - There’s been a lot of talk recently about issues concerning “corporate censorship” after Facebook shut down Roger Ebert’s page, supposedly because some people complained about his comments (on Twitter, not Facebook) concerning a death, which some took offense to. A lot of people are jumping on the “censorship” bandwagon, and part of it makes me wonder if we need a different word. When a private company “censors,” it’s quite different from when a government “censors,” and using the same word often leads to confusion.

But, perhaps a larger point of this is how private companies now have tremendous say over what speech they will and will not allow. That’s legal, but it leads to certain arbitrariness, as was demonstrated here, with many people thinking Facebook went too far. The company later tried to claim it was a “mistake,” but not many people seem to believe that.

However, I think where this gets more interesting is in raising a separate issue: the total pointlessness and arbitrariness of the “jerk patrol.” Some people apparently disliked Ebert’s comments. That’s fair enough, but does a few “offended” people mean he should lose his account? That’s what makes lots of people quite uncomfortable. As it should. And yet, as all of this is happening, there are all these efforts to try to criminalize being a “jerk” online. But, as this little kerfuffle shows, what is and what is not “a jerk” or “offensive” is totally subjective, in most cases, and offending one person is hardly a reason to take action against the speaker. It’s too bad that Facebook doesn’t seem to recognize that, but it’s even scarier when governments pass laws without understanding it.
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I personally think Roger Ebert is a pompous toad.  But sadly enough, the offended get the long shrift. The idea that we can maintain a society of unoffended people and call it civil is an abomination to creative thought, to vibrant give and take. It insults the individual at the expense of the many.
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Monday, June 20, 2011

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Friday, June 17, 2011

Let's Get Ready to Rumble - 2012 Edition

Ever since Barack Obama was elected, a lot of pundits have asked: who will run against him in 2012? They do that because they're paid to of course, but as the election draws nearer perhaps we should take the matter a little more seriously. So,here is an E-Z cut out n’keep list of possible Republican candidates for next years presidential race so far.

1. Sarah Palin
This month, Sarah Palin was traveling around America on the “One Nation” bus tour. This was a bit like 60s author Ken Kesey’s bus tours, only substituting Tea Party rhetoric for LSD tabs. The predictable media frenzy turned into a circus, chasing her from one point to the other, ready to pounce on any word mispronounced or gaff of any kind. Is this bus tour the prelude to something big? Will she finally declare her candidacy?

To which I reply: If she does, she’s not going to win, so who cares?

2. Newt Gingrich
Newt was famous during the Clinton era, when he was Republican leader of the House. Since my main memories of that political period involve cigars in strange places, I'm rather vague on what Gingrich did, although he claims a lot of credit for reforming social security and fixing the economy. Gingrich is often criticized by Democrats for his personal life: he allegedly notified his first wife that he was leaving her for another woman while she was sick with cancer, and carried on lustily with a staffer (now wife #3) throughout Clinton's impeachment proceedings. And while this is indeed all rather unsavory, I note that unlike the late Edward Kennedy he never abandoned a young lady to drown, a vile act regularly smiled upon as a regrettable youthful indiscretion by many of the same Democrats who abominate Gingrich for his personal failings.

3. Ron Paul
Ron Paul is a wee man with big ears who organizes a side show each election time when he runs for the Republican candidacy, in which he talks about withdrawing from all wars and ending all kinds of government benefits, etc. Libertarians on the internet get very excited and for a month or two he wins lots of online polls. Then he goes away.

4. Mitt Romney
Mitt Romney is a Mormon who would really, really like to be president. As far as I am aware, Romney, who is a Mormon, did an acceptable job as governor of Massachusetts and was a successful (Mormon) businessman, so no doubt he has a firmer grip of economics than Obama, who has never had a job in the private sector (and is not a Mormon). However Romney, who is a Mormon, passed health care legislation in Massachusetts which is very similar to Obama’s program, which is reviled by most Republicans, so that’s a problem. Oh, and did I mention that he is a Mormon? I have never met an unpleasant Mormon, but for some reason the media feels the need to keep reminding the electorate that Mitt is a Mormon.

PS: he’s a Mormon.

5. Tim Pawlenty
Tim Pawlenty is a man, from somewhere, rumored to be a former governor, who pundits enjoy talking about because nobody knows who he is and so it makes them sound knowledgeable.

6. Herman Cain.
Herman Cain has never held political office, but he did run a pizza chain once, so that’s reassuring. If selected as the Republican candidate, he could become America’s second black president. This would cause a severe existential crisis among the race baiters who declare all opposition to Obama’s policies the result of white bigotry; although given that they derive an almost erotic pleasure from their shrill denunciations, I’m sure they’d carry on regardless.

7. Rick Perry
Until last week, Rick Perry, the governor of Texas, insisted that he was not interested in running for president. No doubt encouraged by the weakness of his potential rivals, he now says he is “thinking about it.” On economic policy, Perry would make a strong candidate: apparently in two out of the last four years, Texas created more jobs than the other 49 states combined. Perry would also be conservative on social issues and much less embarrassed by American power than Obama, who prefers to “lead from behind,” whatever that means.

The conventional wisdom is that Perry couldn’t win because post-Bush America is still suffering from Texas fatigue. But I wonder if this isn’t a little overblown. After all, President Obama has adopted many of the policies of his “cowboy” predecessor, whether it be keeping Guantanamo open, continuing the unlimited detention of terrorists without trial, using robots to blow up terrorists and their families, or spending lots of cash he doesn’t have on inefficient government programs. More amazing still, none of this inspires any heartburn in the people who made such a big deal about hating Bush.

Thus, perhaps George W. Bush has already been rehabilitated by Mr. Obama, ironically enough. Is America ready for even more Texas in the shape of a President Perry? We shall see.

To be continued..........
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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Weiner Finally Goes Down.

Congressman gets grip on situation and withdraws.

The Arrogant always get their due.......... 
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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Horray for Old Dudes!


 Taki's Magazine - Ever hang out with an old dude? They’re pretty great. They’re not self-obsessed the way boomers are. They’re not “over it” the way Generation X is, and they’re not completely tuned-out like the kids today. Here are ten more great things about them:

1. THEY FOUGHT IN A WAR
 WWII and Korean War vets have amazing anecdotes. Sure, it’s horrific to hear about fighter planes cutting people in half with lines of spraying bullets, but old guys know how to temper the bad with some hilarious good, like the time that guy took a shit in an officer’s shoe.  The older Vietnam vets are fun to hang out with; the younger ones, not so much. Getting war stories out of them is like pulling teeth, and when they do finally give you some details, they get this lost look in their eyes that bums out the whole party.

2. THEY TELL GREAT STORIES
It’s not only their war stories that are a barrel of laughs. These guys have been honing their material for decades and have the whole “beginning, middle, and end” thing down to a science. I was lucky enough to hang out with Jimmy Kimmel’s uncle Frank a few years ago, and his yarns about being NYPD in the 1950s made me want to buy a time machine. “The amount of young ladies I was with back then would shock you,” he told me. “They loved the uniform and it loved them.”

3. THEY’RE POLITCALLY INCORRECT
They don’t even know “gook” is a bad word, and to hear racial epithets laced seamlessly into the dialogue evokes a time when we didn’t have to worry about such bullshit. Old men laugh in the face of every “ism” and “phobia,” and if that offends you, they laugh even harder—as Taki did when he was vilified for saying “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, and if you liked pussy, you’d still be with us” about Liberace’s death.

4. THEY’RE SELFLESS
He may be an old man now, but the second his first kid came out of his wife’s vagina, he peaced-out the whole idea of “me” and mentally switched it to “the family”—forever. He’d happily work seven days a week if it meant his family was provided for, and his idea of a midlife crisis was finding out his kid didn’t get into college (an opportunity he never had).

5. THEY DRESS PROPERLY
They never show up to the airport without a suit on. If it’s hot, they’ll have a seersucker with a perfectly broken-in straw fedora.

6. THEY TELL GOOD JOKES
Because they come from a time when everyone who wasn’t a WASP deserved to be made fun of, old men have an endless list of zingers that sound like a celebrity roast for multiculturalism. The culmination of all these was beautifully expressed in Gran Torino when Walt Kowalski says, “A Mexican, a Jew, and a colored guy go into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, ‘Get the fuck outta here.’”

They also love hearing good jokes like nobody else. When I told an old guy the best line I ever wrote—“My only problem with women breastfeeding in public is they never wink back”—he died laughing and then dragged me around the bar making sure I told every guy there.

7. THEY DON’T CHEAT
The beauty of living in a world untouched by feminism is the men actually, sincerely, honestly, revere women. Your grandfather never cheated on your grandmother, and if his best friend cheated on his wife, he wouldn’t talk to the guy for forty years.

8. IF YOU CROSS THEM, YOU’RE DEAD TO THEM
 There’s no sense apologizing and begging for forgiveness, and you probably should have thought of that before you opened your stupid goddamned mouth and called him a liar. He was telling the truth, you asshole, and it was for your own good.  As amazing old guy Horace Greeley put it back in olden times, “Fame is fleeting; popularity an accident; riches take wings. Only one thing endures: character.” Actions have consequences when you’re dealing with men of character.

9. THEY TAKE PRIDE IN THEIR WORK
Whether it’s fixing a faucet or painting a birdhouse, these guys bring their handmade wood toolbox to the job, do it right the first time, and neatly put everything away when they’re done. If you can’t eat off an old guy’s workbench, he’s not an old guy.

10. THEY’RE THE REAL DEAL
 While couch potatriots and armchair activists sit indoors screaming through their keyboards, old dudes are walking softly outside with a big stick. They’re not particularly fond of fags, but platitudes such as, “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it” aren’t platitudes to old guys. They really will grab a gun and fight for you. They already did.
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Saturday, June 11, 2011

Pelosi - Member Should Stand Up Strong.

Yahoo News - Amid increasing calls for Rep. Anthony Weiner to resign, House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi says the decision should be up to the congressman and his New York constituents.

 Big Weiner Fan
Nancy Pelosi 
The former speaker said in San Francisco that she believes firmly the decision should be made by "the individual member" and the people in his district.

Weiner did pick up support from Rep. Charles Rangel, a New York Democrat who was censured by the House last year for ethics violations.
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Friday, June 10, 2011

Thursday, June 9, 2011

When Jon Stewart mocks your coverage ......

There’s much talk now among the talking heads and flapping rectum class on television about the recent events come to be to known as "Weinergate". As I look back at what newspapers, magazines, websites, and cable news did to cover Weinergate, I can only feel embarrassed for them because they clearly took the lazy way out.
Seriously, CNN's in-depth coverage consisted of...talking to Weiner's office and accepting his usual insistence that he’s ‘fighting for the common folk’ instead of spending a great deal of time taking pictures of wee wew and e-mailing them hither-and-yon and hitting up women half his age. To them, end of the story. CNN, let me give you some advice. When Jon Stewart mocks your coverage and essentially scoops you, you're doing something wrong. Hello!


And over at the asylum known as MSNBC, the entire torrid affair was just called the usual 'Rightwing Conspiracy'. 
Real reporters would have been digging more deeply than just talking to a press secretary or repeating a carefully crafted press release. The real reporting on both sides was done by the blogosphere. You hear that, New York Times? Bloggers did your job for you. You may not have cared to spend time researching the story, but DailyKos sure did! And say what you will about Andrew Breitbart, the fact is he got the story right from the start and the rest of the world had to catch up.

Quit turning a blind eye and just being PR puppets for the Democrat party. Where is your skepticism and verification, your integrity? It's because of your  built-in bias that Barney Frank and Charlie Rangel, to name just two, would probably be in jail if you were doing your job!  But I don't see it happening any time soon. So until then, I guess we'll have to get used to you media watchdogs lying on the porches of your master's ivory towers while the blogosphere gets out the real truth.
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Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Pelosi Jumps on Weiner....Demands Probing

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) announced that she was calling for a House ethics committee probe into whether government resources had been mishandled.

“I am calling for an Ethics Committee investigation to determine whether any official resources were used or any other violation of House rules occurred.”

[..snip..]

I refuse to make jokes about such serious matters as this.
No, not me.
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Friday, June 3, 2011

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Please Keep Your Weiner to Yourself.

  
This is how you know your elected officials
are incapable of running a country:
  
We live in an Information Age, where communications are instantaneous, and the ability to transmit and diffuse information at, almost literally at light speed, is a fact of life. We live in an age of a 24-hour news cycle, with thousands of outlets constantly searching for any bit of anything that is even of the slightest interest, hungry for even more channels of input, and ways to devour more airtime at a profit. We live in an age where everyone and his dog has a video camera, recording device, cell phone, computer, and access to thousands, if not millions, of databases where they can record, store, examine and retrieve almost every fact of your life, every utterance, every (you think) secret, every correspondence from the most inconsequential to the greatest of All-Time-Biggest-Bonehead moves.

You would think that someone who's claim to rule over us peasants was based upon the presumptions of superior intelligence and integrity would be extremely circumspect about what he/she does on the Internet. But I guess not.  Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) is an insufferable twit and the most-aptly named man in Washington.  


Enough said! 
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